Just want to take a day off
A big challenge of running a small business is dealing with employees‘ requests for time off. One morning an employee said, “I need to leave early tomorrow.” Later that same day, he followed up with, “Looks like I‘ll be coming in late tomorrow, but if my coming in late runs into my leaving early, then I won‘t be in at all.”
Good place for smoking
Some people have a knack for remembering faces. Others, according to this e-mail I received at work, go them one better: “The only designated smoking area at Building One is at the picnic benches, under the covered area, where the butt distinguishers are.”
Work closer to home
My friend‘s hour-and-a-half commute to work got old quickly—the time spent stuck in traffic was sending him over the edge. So I was happy for him when he found a new job closer to home.
”That‘s great,” I said. “What are you doing now?”
”I‘m a bus driver.”
As a rookie in the Atlantic City, N.J., Police department, I was assigned a beat on the boardwalk. Hardly a day went by when I didn‘t come upon a child who had become separated from his parents.
One afternoon, I spotted a small boy standing alone, obviously lost. I tried to gain his confidence – I took him to the nearest ice-cream stand and bought him a cone. Time passed with no sign of the boy‘s parents, so the next step was to call for a patrol car to take him to headquarters. I told the small fry to stay put while I went to the call box. When I returned, he was nowhere in sight.
Within minutes, the car arrived, and one of the patrolmen asked me where the child was. I felt stupid; it‘s humiliating to say you‘ve lost a lost child. But I told the officers what had happened and gave a description of the boy. “What did you treat him?” asked one of the men. “An ice-cream cone. Why?” “Because,” answered the officer, “that kid lives only a few blocks from here, and you‘ve about the fifth rookie he‘s conned for a treat!”